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Sharing the Journey from Bereaved to Shining Light Parent
Gertie Heck's Double Validation from her son Joey through Pauline Mason and Drew Cali

Gertie Heck's Double Validation from her son Joey through Pauline Mason and Drew Cali

  • Posted
    • Nov
    • 16
    • 2023
by Elizabeth Boisson

Joey and his Grandma, Pauline Mason, Drew Cali

I’ve been low key lately, feeling a bit abandoned, though I know it is in my head, it can take on a snowball effect.  I found myself crying on Sunday asking for something, anything to help open my heart up again.

48 hours later, I got on with the HPH zoom with Pauline Mason.  The first thing that comes to her is the name Jodie.  No one responds so I ask if it could be Joey.  

It is, and Pauline brings up his skateboarding, his daredevil antics in the different sports he enjoyed, hats he wore, etc.  Not only that but when you see them in the corner of your eye, don’t turn your head to see them but keep them in your peripheral sight which happened that morning, though I did turn to see him.  I didn’t know not to turn your head.  Think that will be hard to remember though!  

Then she asked about a birthday as he showed up with cake!  Yes, my dad’s birthday is this same day! How awesome is that?  So much validation! 

But I think what had the most impact was when she reminded me that he loves me as much a I do him.  I forget that sometimes.  It was good to be reminded.  

Thank you Pauline!

But that wasn’t the end of it!  Drew Cali was on later the same day.  I told my son I was going to go to it also as I enjoy Drew personality. 

I’ve not ever had this happen, but once again, on the same day, my loved ones show up!  This time my mother more than my son, but he showed up earlier in the day and I know my mother… she has to have her say also!

Drew had said earlier that sometimes he connects with someone you don’t expect to show up.  So, when he brought up my husband’s younger brother who passed forty years ago, I was pretty amazed. Drew was spot on with the young age and accident to the names of my husband and one of my sons. A combination of both families to verify it was for me.

I think of them often now since my son left this world to be in theirs. I never knew how that all impacted their mother and their lives till my own son passed.  Beautiful validation of them saying thank you for remembering us. That meant a lot.

Then my mother stepped in.  From her loving having Christmas music on to the big Christmas light bulbs to the fake tree of hers I put up each year!  And then to her table in my kitchen and her green and white tablecloth!  Drew said he couldn’t make up about the tablecloth and I agreed… it is kind of ugly.  He said I know; I’m looking at it lol!

So many validations, and a message of get back and get involved.  I knew what that meant.  Open my heart, get back into my daily rituals.   I’ve been isolating. 

To give is to receive, helping others helps me too.  Spiritual has ritual in it.  Need to remember that.

Then Drew said there were a lot of people showing up so my son couldn’t get through them.  It was like a party, so I told him it was my dad’s birthday! Wow!  Dad’s birthday gift was apparently giving me what I needed, and I thank him…them…

Thank you all for showing up for me when I needed it so…. Thank you HPH for giving us a forum to do this, and thank you Drew for being you!  I love your cray-cray!!!

~Written by Joey’s mom, Gertie Heck

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