The Wisdom of Greg - LEARNING TO UNLEARN
Posted
-
- Nov
- 7
- 2025
by Elizabeth Boisson
Written by Susan Van Oije with Bill and Greg
Bill is just an ordinary guy who has had extraordinary things happen to him since the passing of his son Greg. Susan writes it all down. The Calgary, Canada affiliate leaders are on an amazing journey with their son.
LEARNING TO UNLEARN
We've often heard of this place where we've chosen to reincarnate referred to as Earth School, where we can learn through our experiences and hardships and grow our souls. In a surprising insight that has advanced our understanding of our soul's journey, our son Greg on the other side has told us that the most important thing to learn while we're in this school is to unlearn.
After decades of intense conditioning, training and repetition, it turns out that to get an advanced degree in being our true self we have to set aside what we've learned. As Greg says with his wonderful dry sense of humor, we're realizing that "perhaps not all your personality traits are working for you in your best interest," and what got us here won't help us get where we want to go.
Unlearning is not about forgetting, it's a process of letting go. It's getting rid of old habits, ideas and behaviors that do not serve us in this next, exciting stage of our soul's journey, a stage that for so many of us was launched by the passing of our beloved child. We're learning that we can get rid of the fears and self-perceived limitations we cling to in survival mode in this 3D reality. As Greg emphatically tells us: "Throw out the old tapes!"
We're relearning our direct connection to the Divine Source - a connection that was never lost but forgotten by some - and rediscovering that we are powerful co-creators of our life's story with the ability to choose our state of being in every moment, regardless of our external circumstances. Now the real homework begins!
Greg emphasizes that an important part of the process of learning to unlearn is to become the observer of our thoughts and feelings, because as he repeatedly says: "You are what you think and feel." For example, a defense mechanism that has served me in the past for survival but I now understand is an unproductive habit is the scenario planning skills I've honed over decades of fear and anxiety.
I've jokingly described myself as "easy-breezy" because I know that is the exact opposite of what I am. Greg has of course heard me say that, and when I was recently feeling off balance, I asked Bill (who channels our son and automatic writes what Greg says) to ask him for some of his wisdom:
"The only thing you need to do is take care of yourself. Watch your feelings and thoughts so you are in the best place to receive all of the Universe's gifts. So what do you need to do? Let go and let God handle it all. It becomes very simple and very easy. Just take care of and love yourself. Be kind to yourself...All your energy should be saved for you to keep you in the best place to receive the abundance. Only then can you be of assistance to others. Be content. Be at peace. And be as loving to yourself as you can be, so no pressure, no stress, easy-breezy Mother!"
Greg has also guided us to unlearn our busy-ness: "Yoda said it perfectly: Patience you must have. 'Let go and let God' means wait for God to show you the hand you need to play. Wait for the dealer to give you your cards, and then take action as required. Mom and you are both busy beings and that needs to be unlearned. Accept the flow as it comes. Do not try to create the flow, or you will find yourself paddling upstream. Find peace in watching and do 'no thing'. It is acceptable and desired behavior. Otherwise it's to and fro, back and forth, in and out, forward and backward. You get the drift. A lot of effort and not much results, or some achieve results but at a cost. All activities in life must be approached this way. Let the flow come to you. Don't try to create the flow. That is control and does no one any favors. Be a human being rather than a human doing. Human doing is ego. Human being is consciousness aligned with Source."
When we learn to unlearn, we enter a state of being that causes our guides and our higher self on the other side to celebrate because we have finally become what Greg calls "reachable and teachable." If you're spending a good portion of your days (and nights) thinking negative thoughts about how you're not coming up to the mark, here's what Greg had to say to us about becoming teachable in a download to his Dad:
"Those feelings and thoughts of not coming up to snuff are a waste of time. When these thoughts enter your mind, you are in your mind, and behind enemy lines. That is ego. It is not a heart-centered approach to self. You both need to be much kinder to yourselves. Accept all you do as the best for that moment...You can always do better or different the next time. As long as you understand how you handled a situation and learn from it and grow and try to do it better the next time based on your insights, you are making progress.
"The other part of the equation is that all has played out exactly as it was meant to and all results and experiences need to be accepted, for there are no mistakes. Give yourself a break. Learn and move on and try to respond in the future with more awareness, more love, and more acceptance and tolerance of yourself and your behavior. No one in a 3D world is perfect and it is not about perfection. That standard can never be accomplished. It is about loving and acceptance of self no matter how you respond to a situation. What determines where you go in the world on Earth and in a 5D reality is based upon one and one thing only: Am I teachable? Do I move towards love in all my responses to my situation, regardless of my shortcomings, and do I love myself and forgive myself for the way I am? We do. God does...Because you are willing to improve and better yourselves, that makes you teachable."
From the larger perspective, what Greg is teaching us is to truly and unconditionally love ourselves by learning to go with the flow: "Pick the higher vibration in response to your circumstance and float downstream knowing all is as it should be, all is well, and you are not alone," Greg says. "You do not need to struggle alone in situations with the ego in charge. There is an easier and softer way. Turn to love, love for yourself, and let the Universe point the way. It does not need to be hard. Float downstream instead of trying to paddle upstream and before you know it you will be able to consistently experience happiness and joy no matter what this Earth throws at you. For that is why you came here. Not to be a victim or controlling, but to navigate hardship with joy and love for yourself, no matter what."
I was intrigued to find out that the concept of learning to unlearn that Greg introduced to us has in fact echoed through the centuries. Rumi, a Sufi mystic living in Persia in the 13th century, wrote that unlearning is the highest form of learning. And I was not surprised to discover that Yoda (Greg often references the wise Jedi Master!) has this to say when he's training Luke Skywalker, who believes it's impossible to use the Force to levitate his X-wing fighter out of the swamp: "You must unlearn what you have learned."
The unlearning can start with small shifts as you become a creator of your own life's story with deliberate, positive choices in alignment with Source, and not self will. "Any time you can have an insight into behavior controlled by your ego that no longer functions in the most loving way for yourself, that is progress," Greg says.
Our kids are cheering us on, and they're wondering: "What are you going to unlearn?"
If you would like to hear more about our amazing experiences, click HPH welcomed Susan & Bill Van Oije, 'From Wow to How!' for the HPH YouTube video of the beautiful messages Greg gives us about how to live our best life in this very challenging place and grow our souls, and click On February 3rd, Bill Van Oije spoke to Helping Parents Heal for the video that details some of the astounding signs we've received from our son.

- NEW AFFILIATE GROUP! HPH - Orange County, CA with Ray & Lori Romaine
- Hope Duffy's Validation with her daughter Gabby through Kathi Behrens

