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Sharing the Journey from Bereaved to Shining Light Parent
Deborah Connors' Validation from her son Jimi with Medium Britta

Deborah Connors' Validation from her son Jimi with Medium Britta

  • Posted
    • Jan
    • 18
    • 2024
by Elizabeth Boisson

Jimi and Medium Britta

I had a wonderful surprise visit from my son on the HPS session Nov 21st with Medium Britta!   She connected with a young man who was tall and lanky with dark hair and who was very adventurous.  Could have been for several of us, but when she mentioned a coin collection & digital coins, I knew it was my son Jimi!  I just found our 2 state quarter collections & I had a coin collection as a kid, but he got into Bitcoin digital currency in 2018 and purchased items from Japan every month with it.  He loved cryptocurrency technology, especially as a gifted computer engineer & programmer.

She mentioned his best friend growing up.  Cameron basically lived at our house & was like his brother.  He and his wife had their first baby on Nov 25th 4 days after this session and I know Jimi knew that his best friend was going to be a daddy 😊

Britta said that “his life is bigger than what I remember” and they’re right. Too often I remember more of what he couldn’t do rather than see it from his perspective of all that he did get to do.  Even when he was limited physically, he had an impact on people he connected with online who suffered from chronic illness, depression, addictions etc and he made himself available to anyone who wanted to talk, day or night.  Shy in person, he put himself out there online and I heard from so many people of how much he helped them that I didn’t even know about.  It’s so easy to focus on the ‘what should have beens’ and to hold onto what we missed with them rather than feel joy for the moments we did have and the life they lived.  “his life is bigger than what I remember” – what a profound way for him to see it and it’s time for me to see it that way, too. 

I just found a whole container of his artwork, notes & cards, writings from grade school, and so many forgotten memories!  I sat and read his stories out loud, opened older photo albums, and actually laughed at so much of it!  Of course I did wish that we had gone thru them together, but I honestly felt that he was with me, so when Britta asked about photo albums and said that he enjoyed our ‘photo journey’, I knew he really was there!  He lost a lot of his early memories after his accident, so we were always making new ones.  We hadn’t gone thru the printed photobooks in a long time, so I spent a few hours remembering the times he had forgotten and I was talking out loud like he was there with me!  What a tremendous joy and heart-lift to hear her say that he was on that photo journey with me, reminding me once again that our kids share what we do!  Never stop doing things they would love!

There was more, and everything Britta shared with me was from my son.  I’ve had enough evidence that our children are with us, but I still have days where I miss him tremendously.  Ok that’s pretty much every day, but sometimes when it’s more difficult, he pops in unexpectedly and jolts me out of the rabbit hole and reminds me that he’s still here and to stop moping.  My writing is longer than the session, but only because Britta’s words would be just words to someone else without knowing the stories behind them.  I no longer doubt but I do sometimes withdraw and his messages have been precise and meaningful every time!  I’ve been trying to focus on a couple projects with our photos.  She was right that I binge and can’t really plan – you have to be in the right frame of mind and some days I can do hours and some days none at all.  We do the best we can.  And sometimes our children find a beautiful soul with a gift who gives us a message of hope, of peace, and most definitely of undying love.  Thank you, Britta, for my son’s words.  Because of this, I finally ordered the canvas prints we’ve wanted and will hang the first prints in his room, now with our combined computer space.  It’s become a therapeutic and happier room and I know he’s gonna love his photo gifts!!  

~Much love from Jimi’s mom, Deborah Connors

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