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Sharing the Journey from Bereaved to Shining Light Parent
Melanie Richard's Validation Story from her son Kris through Lisa Wilcoxson

Melanie Richard's Validation Story from her son Kris through Lisa Wilcoxson

  • Posted
    • Sep
    • 6
    • 2023
by Elizabeth Boisson

Lisa Wilcoxson, Kris

First off, I want to give a heart felt thank you to HPH, the executive and all its members. I’m relatively new to this group, and have greatly benefited from the daily posts, messages, supportive materials and Zoom meetings. While I regularly read and send love and care in response to posted messages, finding a voice and putting words to my own experience and thoughts has been difficult and so I’ve remained mostly silent. However, on this occasion I feel compelled to introduce my boy Kristofor and share this validation story with the hope that others may benefit from it.

I wouldn’t describe Kris as particularly confident or chatty in a social situation, unless he was familiar with the crowd, so it was an unexpected gift to have him come through in the gallery reading with Lisa Wilcoxson on August 31. I sincerely acknowledge Lisa and all our kids for providing a welcoming space for him to do so. It brings comfort to know that our kids are working together, and as such, information that comes through resonates with many parents.

Just to share a few things that absolutely validate our children are still with us, Lisa started off the reading with a young man, the colour yellow, travel, red hair in the family and the name Chris, Christian or Christopher. All of these made sense to me, as my son’s name is Kris, I was sitting in a yellow room, had recently traveled and returned from visiting my sister and family in Minnesota, and both of her children are redheads. Lisa spoke of how the cousins are very important, and this is so very true. Kristofor was (is) very close with his cousins and absolutely adores them. There’s so many happy memories of togetherness, whether visiting them in the summer, yearly fall vacations in Florida, or Christmas holidays here in Canada. Information also came through about how something my son wore was given to his cousin. This indeed occurred. We gave my nephew one of Kris’ Project Rock sweatshirts and a tank top, as my nephew is a huge fan of The Rock and they both liked to work out. Lisa also brought up how Kris was showing her someone beside a BBQ or stove wearing a speedo, and the speedo was significant. This most certainly was evidential, as Kris and his cousins shared a similar sense of silly humor and my nephew had made these funny videos of himself while wearing a red and white speedo with a Maple Leaf logo on the front (you cant make this stuff up!).

Towards the end of the visit from Kris, Lisa was shown a checker board, the message of black and white, and she felt there was multiple meanings to this. Indeed this resonated with me. On the one hand the colours black and white represent my accepting of the signs I’ve been receiving, and feelings I’ve been experiencing, at face value and not questioning them (as I’ve often done before). The duality in the message, is a special photo of Kris that now sits on our coffee table in the family room (see attached). While originally captured in colour, I had the photo printed and framed in black and white for placement on the remembrance table at his cousin’s wedding last year. The double meaning of what was once before is now black and white.

These are just some of the validations brought forward through Lisa, and of which I’m truly appreciative. They help uplift and remind me of our children’s continued love and presence in our lives. As I always say to my boy each night, I love you to the moon and back, past all the stars, all the galaxies and all the universes, to infinity and beyond and keep going and going and going. It never ends. How could it?

Thank you Lisa. Thank you HPH. Thank you to all our children.

With Love, Melanie Richard

Please watch the YouTube video by clicking here.


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